logan_high_schoolfandomcom-20200213-history
History
History of Wiki The Logan High School Wiki was created in late September of 2018 by a brave troupe of young men and women dedicated to the veneration of LHS. Amongst their numbers were such illustrious names as AbieBobby, TomBomb69, ManWhoEdits, and Father Nut. Against all odds, these fearless heroes set out to do what few have done: get a website onto the first page of google results. It took courage, perseverance, and long hours late at night, but what these brave souls have accomplished over countless months shall go down in the annals of Wiki history. Archive of Events and Happenings See also: Ranger News, Notices and Current Events . 23 November 2019 This day is worthy of a multitude of articles, but for the sake of brevity the most notable events shall be laid forth in this amalgamated format. First of all, the ABSOLUTE MADLAD Ms. Harings served up a hot steaming pile of WWE smackdown to a couple of underclassmen girls who dared engage in unauthorized combat in her vicinity. Local teacher Eric Martin reported with obvious awe in his eyes that she "seized one in each hand and hurled them up against the walls, one on each end of the social studies hallway." Both students are in critical condition at Gundersen hospital, but are expected to make full recoveries. As if that wasn't enough, a well-known minor whose name is illegal to publish went on a heated rant at the Health Science Academy about how kids with single parents suck, and the local S.W.A.T. team had to be called in. After a tense half-hour standoff, authorities finally got the situation under control and classes resumed as normal. Police Chief Shawn Kudron reminded students that in the future, proper emergency procedure it to call Ms. Harings first and dial 9-1-1 second. In a most likely unrelated incident, someone pooped on the floor in the band hallway bathroom. As per school policy, the entire male population of the band went and gawked. Various onlookers described the incident as "wack," "nuts," and "broooo." In other news, Standing Lunch has moved on to its third table. Happy Birthdays were sung as usual, and the movement shows no signs of slowing. Students should be notified that The Standers shall sit when and only when the entire student body stands for lunch, after which five dollars shall be donated to the charity of Mr. Martin's choice. Finally, the day closed out with a group of protesters informing the school that Black Lives Matter. Apparently it's NOT okay to use the N-word. Who knew? Next thing you know someone's going to go around claiming vaping has negative side effects or something crazy like that. Anyways, that closes out the recap of Friday, November 23nd. Brother Gnewikow can't wait to see all your smiling faces again when we get back from this 9-day Thanksgiving break on December 2th. . Yoda Letdown of 2019 I cannot describe my sheer despair at not getting to hear Brother Gnewikow's Yoda voice. So I won't. . 3/7/19: A Brief History of Assassins It all started one perfectly normal day, not that long ago. It had been a long week of boring school, and the peasants were getting restless. Minds were high-strung, bodies were restless, and the scene was set for murder. Although the exact origins are unknown, the catalyzing factor was probably when someone brought up this wacky trend that a cousin in the far-off lands of Kentucky had shared with him. Since that day, those of us who participated have transformed on a basic level. Friendships have been ruined, lives lost. The game: assassins. The goal: kill or be killed. The first game was unsophisticated and uncoordinated, but nonetheless thrilling. The way it worked was we each had a person secretly and randomly assigned to us; they were our targets. The ultimate objective was to, by the end of the day, karate chop your target on the back of the neck without being chopped yourself. A successful assassination granted you another kill and another target, in the form of the target's target. Unfortunately, we didn't organize it at all, so several independent death circles developed, with winners eventually getting themselves as a target. Since that first round, we have designated a Kingpin to arrange the names in a circle, and everything has become one big, sophisticated bloodbath. Notable occurrences include many near-kills, deception, and even minor trespassing. The author, who refuses to disclose him/herself for fear of disciplinary action, can personally recount a time where he was one of three survivors, and snuck into his target's house with the aid of the target's sibling. Said sibling called said target up for lemon bars, and that's when all hell broke loose. The target was neutralized in-game, but out-of-game target lost it and beat the living shit out of the author. We have since put restrictions on house entry, but Assassins is still necessarily stressful. You see, there is something primal and barbaric in the rush of adrenaline as one moves in for the kill, or the constant fear of the slightest shadow moving in one's peripheral vision. Lunch, with its miasma of bodies and relative exposedness, is like something out of a horror movie, nightmare, horror movie about nightmares, or nightmare about horror movies. Honestly, I'm just glad to be alive after this. . The Breaking of the Egg, 2/25/19 Local junior Abie Sprain, loser of the banana touch, had to put an egg in his pocket as Punishment. Chaos and yolkage ensued. Despite Sprain's valiant efforts, he was unable to avoid the unstoppable arc of one Tommy Lenz's water bottle at the moment he thought he was safest. Egg was reported in the Band Hallway bathroom for days to come. . Legal Failsafe Miracle of 1/22/19 On this miraculous and coincidental day in history, two users created more or less the exact same piece of Wiki text at more or less the exact same time! Those two users will now forevermore have their handles etched into the rock that is the wiki history page in honor of their valiant and coinciding efforts. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Airplay of 1/15/19 On January 15, 2018, the first day of finals, someone figured out that the pit has unsecured Airplay. Fortnite and later PorkHup ensued (you're welcome all you good boys and gorls with Aristotle running). . . . . . . . . Christmas 2018 The 4th Hr Gang had a Christmas Bash, involving cookies, lights, hot cocoa, Cards Against Humanity, and Dean of Students Ms. Forde. . . = Thanksgiving 2018 Unfortunately, all photographic records of this monumentous event have been lost to present anthropology authorities, but it is ingrained in the minds of those who witnessed it and now in the wiki as well. On the day before Thanksgiving, in the year 2018 AD, Brother and now Father Gnewikow was witnessed by the entire student body to be dispensing vast hunks of delicious, succulent HAM. . Humanities 2016 Notable things: 1) Giving marty adult diapers, 2) Finding pics of Carlson and excommunicating Levi, 3) Czech yourself before you Oedipus Rex yourself . . . . . . deleted again ok I deleted the thing that stated that the "delete if gay" thing was deleted. I was just sick and tired of seeing that stupid little "deleted" heading. It just ruins the overall feng shui of the home page, ya know. so yeah. I deleted it. Delete if Gay History of Delete if Gay So this one time in APUSH, Mr. Martin had us do a Kahoot, and Daddy Cash put his username as Delete If Gay. Marty deleted it. Other sources state that this master of trickery was not Cash Money, but Jae Walt. Anyways, someone put a heading on the main page right here that said Delete If Gay, and someone deleted it citing their gayness. Someone else then deleted the message saying it was deleted. Currently that message stands, residing above this sub-notice. Update: Delete if gay moved to History Delete if gay has been moved to History from the home page because it makes us look better. Thank you kind soul who moved this.